Life is funny, isn’t it?
You live day to day, week to week, year to year—until one day, you look up and realize you’ve landed in a life that doesn’t quite feel like your own. Maybe it’s not where you thought you’d be. Maybe you feel stuck, lost, or like you’re simply getting by instead of fully living.
That was me, just three years ago.
Today, I’m sharing my personal midlife reinvention journey. From my past struggles to the changes I made, and now to the exciting future I’m building, this is my story. But it’s not just about me—it’s about what’s possible for you, too.
Because midlife isn’t a crisis—it’s a rebirth.
And if you’re a woman over 40 wondering if it’s too late to reinvent yourself, trust me when I say this: Midlife is your time to shine.
Let’s dive in.
If you had asked me in 2022 how I was doing, I would have given you the standard answer: “I’m fine.” But I wasn’t fine.
Not even close.
I was 47 years old, a single mom working in the mortgage industry as an underwriter. My son was away at college, and I was incredibly proud of him. But while he was thriving, I was barely surviving.
I was working 50 to 60 hours a week just to stay afloat—paying bills, keeping the lights on, and making sure he had what he needed. I was living paycheck to paycheck. Stressed. Overwhelmed.
And physically?
At my heaviest, I weighed 390 pounds. My body hurt. I was exhausted all the time. I had no energy, no motivation, and honestly, I didn’t recognize myself in the mirror anymore.
Friendships were few and far between. My social circle had shrunk. I wasn’t making time for hobbies or joy. My personal style was nonexistent, and I had no beauty routine to speak of. Self-care? Forget it. Life had worn me down.
I was stuck.
But here’s the thing about hitting rock bottom—it gives you a chance to build something new.
And that’s exactly what I decided to do.
In 2022, when the mortgage industry took a nosedive, my company laid off over 300 employees. I was one of them. After years of dedication, I was suddenly unemployed.
Yes, they gave me a generous severance package—but it didn’t make me feel any safer.
I didn’t waste time. The very next day, I was job hunting, sending out resumes, and trying to stay strong for my son.
But inside, I was falling apart. I was terrified. I realized that day that something had to change. Not just my job—but me.
Within a month of being laid off, I made a decision. I was no longer going to be a passive participant in my life. I wasn’t going to settle for survival mode. It was time to reinvent myself—mind, body, and soul.
Here’s how I did it—and how you can, too.
1. Prioritizing My Health and Wellness
I knew my health had to come first. At 390 pounds, I was putting tremendous strain on my body. I was on multiple medications for blood pressure and other issues. I was prediabetic. I wasn’t moving my body or nourishing it in ways that fueled me. So I started small.
I began walking my neighborhood every morning before work. Ten minutes at first. Then twenty. I put in my earbuds and listened to personal development audiobooks and uplifting podcasts. (Mel Robbins became my morning walking buddy!)
I learned that small habits add up to big changes.
I worked with my doctor and started weight loss medication for about five months. It gave me a boost, but it was the habits I was building—meal prepping, exercising, and focusing on whole foods—that made the biggest difference.
I stopped using food as entertainment or comfort and started viewing it as fuel. I learned to eat to nourish my body, not numb my feelings.
2. Paying Off Debt and Gaining Financial Freedom
As a single mom, money stress was a huge part of my life. I was drowning in high-interest credit card debt, an auto loan, and a parent college loan.
I made a plan to take control of my finances.
I got a second job and threw every extra dollar toward my debt—one card at a time. I became laser-focused on budgeting, tracking my expenses, and living within my means.
By the summer of 2024, I was debt-free (except for my car and a small student loan).
The freedom that came with that? Incredible.
No more paycheck-to-paycheck living. No more sleepless nights over money.
3. Building Confidence Through Style and Beauty
As I lost weight and gained energy, I realized something important: I deserved to show up for myself.
No matter my size, no matter my age, I wanted to feel beautiful and confident.
I started exploring plus-size fashion for women over 40. I gave myself permission to play with style again—dressing in ways that made me feel powerful, pretty, and put-together.
I also created a simple beauty routine that made me feel radiant.
Not because I needed to look a certain way for anyone else, but because I deserved to feel good in my own skin.
4. Expanding My Social Circle and Finding Community
For too long, I’d kept to myself. My social circle was tiny, and I was lonely.
But as I grew, I realized how much I craved connection.
I made an effort to reconnect with old friends and meet new people. I said yes to invitations. I joined online communities and groups where women like me were sharing their journeys.
And now? I’m building my own online community—Awaken and Bloom in Midlife—to help women over 40 connect, grow, and thrive together.
5. Embracing Personal Growth and Rediscovery
I devoured personal development books and podcasts. I journaled. I asked myself tough questions.
Who am I now?
What do I want next?
I found the world of life coaching, and it changed everything.
I hired a coach who helped me see my blind spots and build a life I loved.
And then?
I decided to become a life coach myself.
I’m currently on my way to becoming certified through The Life Coach School—because I want to help other midlife women awaken, reinvent, and rediscover themselves just like I did.
By late summer of 2024, everything was different.
• I was down 120 pounds (and still going!)
• I was debt-free
• My son had graduated college, and we celebrated with a dream vacation to Charleston, SC
• I was dressing with confidence, showing up in my life intentionally
• I was building friendships, learning, and finally, loving the woman I was becoming
• And perhaps most importantly? I was happy
But I knew I wasn’t done yet.
There’s still so much more I’m excited to create and experience.
Today, I’ve lost 135 pounds in total and am still working toward my healthiest self. I’m planning for certification as a life coach, growing my brand Jax Stys, and building a platform that empowers midlife women to live with purpose, style, and joy.
Looking ahead, I’m dreaming BIG. I see myself in a beautiful condo near Cleveland, OH, running Jax Stys LLC, and hosting transformational midlife retreats in Charleston, SC. I’ll be coaching women who are ready to rewrite their stories and live lives they are wildly in love with. I’ll be writing books, creating digital planners, and developing courses for women 40+ who want to thrive in midlife. And I’ll be living debt-free, healthy, and fully aligned with my purpose.
Why I’m Sharing My Midlife Reinvention Journey
I’m sharing all of this because I want you to know:
If I can do this, you can too.
You don’t need to settle.
You don’t need to stay stuck.
You don’t need to believe the lie that it’s too late to change.
You are worthy of reinvention.
You are worthy of health, happiness, and fulfillment.
And midlife? It’s not the end—it’s just the beginning.
Join Me on This Journey of Awakening and Reinvention
My blog and social media may look a little different these days. That’s because I’m committed to showing what’s possible when you awaken, reclaim your power, and live with intention.
At uat.themidlifeglowgetter.com/, and @jaxstys you’ll find:
• Wellness tips for midlife health
• Personal growth tools and life coaching advice
• Plus-size fashion inspiration for women over 40
• Beauty routines to help you glow from the inside out
• Financial wellness strategies to create freedom and security
• Encouragement, community, and support for your midlife reinvention
You can also follow my journey on social media @jaxstys, where I share daily inspiration, try-on hauls, wellness tips, and behind-the-scenes looks at my life.
If you take nothing else from my story, take this:
We only get one life. Let’s live a life we’d want to live twice. Let’s stop waiting for permission, the perfect time, or someone to save us.
Midlife is your invitation to awaken, reinvent, and become the woman you were always meant to be. I believe in you. And I’m here to walk alongside you every step of the way.
With love and purpose,
Jax Stys
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